What NOT to do on the Net!
A comment I made a few weeks back on Lisa's site reminded me of this incident. I'm going to give a more elaborated version here.
In this age of instant communication, a split second decision made without double-checking can cause great embarrassment or far worse. One of the most common errors is confusing the foward/reply/reply all buttons. Another is to let one's temper take over, hit send, and then go...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! as one realizes the error of saying what was written. A lesser known issue is the "I sent the wrong file" quandrum. I have been on the receiving end of this particular problem.
One night, I had on my MSN instant messenger. I was talking to a couple of people at once, including a girlfriend who was also talking to several other people. In what seemed like a ramdom gesture, she sent a file over to me. This gal occasionally sent me interesting music files or pictures, so I shrugged and accepted. Sure, she usually introduced a file before she sent it over, but I just assumed whatever the contents were of the file it was something she knew I wanted. No problem.
So, there we are, chatting away, and I open the document. It's a picture of her crotch, pulled apart and shorn. I started laughing hysterically because I KNEW she did not intend on sending that to me.
Now, for the record, if you look in the dictionary under the phrase "anti-prude" you will see a reference to me. Very little embarrasses me or upsets me, and I'm one of those rare women who can stare down another woman's vagina like that and it never affect how I think of her or how I communicate with her. Bare bodies don't bother me. Sex is wonderful. With these two mantras I have, I suppose if she had to err this way, it might as well be with a woman who didn't give a rip and wasn't upset to receive it! I realized, however, that she was going to be VERY upset by her goof. I realized she was talking to her boyfriend at the time and the file was meant for him...and she needed to know why he wasn't responding to her picture. So, this is what I came up with to type back:
"So, that looks really smooth there! Did you use Nair or some other product?"
I think everybody heard her scream of mortification. If your area had a small tremor in September of 2001, that'd have been it. I had to reassure her that it was all ok, and after she calmed down she DID realize that if any person besides her boyfriend had to stare down her crotch, it might as well be somebody laid back enough to just not care (nor perverse enough to post it somewhere on the net!).
So, boys and girls, what is the lesson you can learn here? Remember to check the destination of all emails and files you send out while on the net! That is, unless you WANT your friends to stare at body parts you typically have covered by clothes...
In this age of instant communication, a split second decision made without double-checking can cause great embarrassment or far worse. One of the most common errors is confusing the foward/reply/reply all buttons. Another is to let one's temper take over, hit send, and then go...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! as one realizes the error of saying what was written. A lesser known issue is the "I sent the wrong file" quandrum. I have been on the receiving end of this particular problem.
One night, I had on my MSN instant messenger. I was talking to a couple of people at once, including a girlfriend who was also talking to several other people. In what seemed like a ramdom gesture, she sent a file over to me. This gal occasionally sent me interesting music files or pictures, so I shrugged and accepted. Sure, she usually introduced a file before she sent it over, but I just assumed whatever the contents were of the file it was something she knew I wanted. No problem.
So, there we are, chatting away, and I open the document. It's a picture of her crotch, pulled apart and shorn. I started laughing hysterically because I KNEW she did not intend on sending that to me.
Now, for the record, if you look in the dictionary under the phrase "anti-prude" you will see a reference to me. Very little embarrasses me or upsets me, and I'm one of those rare women who can stare down another woman's vagina like that and it never affect how I think of her or how I communicate with her. Bare bodies don't bother me. Sex is wonderful. With these two mantras I have, I suppose if she had to err this way, it might as well be with a woman who didn't give a rip and wasn't upset to receive it! I realized, however, that she was going to be VERY upset by her goof. I realized she was talking to her boyfriend at the time and the file was meant for him...and she needed to know why he wasn't responding to her picture. So, this is what I came up with to type back:
"So, that looks really smooth there! Did you use Nair or some other product?"
I think everybody heard her scream of mortification. If your area had a small tremor in September of 2001, that'd have been it. I had to reassure her that it was all ok, and after she calmed down she DID realize that if any person besides her boyfriend had to stare down her crotch, it might as well be somebody laid back enough to just not care (nor perverse enough to post it somewhere on the net!).
So, boys and girls, what is the lesson you can learn here? Remember to check the destination of all emails and files you send out while on the net! That is, unless you WANT your friends to stare at body parts you typically have covered by clothes...
posted by Kira | 7:18 AM
11 Comments:
I think the lesson here is that we need more shorn crotch pictures on the Internet. :-)
"Click the Login and Publish Button..."
Did you post something on this before? It sounds familiar.
Also, post nekkid pictures of yourself and any female Asian friends you might have, particularly if you're making out with them.
After much laughing, I began to wonder... did she have a recommendation about the Nair - wax or depilatory? Or another product?
Ah, we're all starting to fear the dreaded oh-no second. If it happens enough, perhaps we'll all get used to it and such things won'g be such a big deal.
I am wondering, however, how you knew it was your friend's crotch, and not someone else's, Kira.
NWJR--You first! :)
SC--fuzzy, but still hawt, I'm sure!
Grant--I posted an abbreviated version of this post on Lisa's site not too long ago. After I posted it, I kept thinking I should actually recall it full blast here, so viola. That may be where you saw it. I will try and hunt up random Asian women to grope and neck by the time your birthday rolls around, ok?
Amanda--I still laugh whenever I think of the incident. Not when I think of her crotch, mind you. That was a very serious vagina. Nope, nothing funny about it. Just the incident :)
Angie--she likes nair, but I can tell you from the UP CLOSE shot I got that it seemed a bit reddish from her using the nair, and my use of nair has always led to red and itchy skin myself. Waxing works and you don't have to worry about it for a while, but it doesn't feel too hot. Then you wander around the house for an hour with solid wax on your crotch, wincing every time you remember you should be ripping it off now (trust me on that one!). I found that a gentle shaving cream plus a three or four bladed razor (new) is the best shot. Two bladed razors leave rashes for me. If I leave off the shaving cream, it's a rash too. It's got to be both. Also remember that you can do shaving daily, but waxing needs to have enough hair above the skin so it can "grip" to rip up, so you end up not being smooth for a while first. that was probably more than you ever wanted to know, eh?
X.dell--because I know more about vaginas than anybody, dear.
Haha! no, in actuality, I knew it was her crotch because my friend was a very, very, VERY white Canadian gal by birth who was also a large girl. There was a lot of her thighs in the shot as well, plus her hand pulling apart her anatomy that had a ring on that I knew was hers. If it weren't her crotch, it was a mighty good fake!
Kira, I can just see the police turning to you for a new line of forensic invstigation.
As long as she didn't shave - that itches like a bitch when it regrows!
X.dell--what would I be, the Valedictorian of Vaginas? The Crotch Catcher? Hmmm. There's lots of potential here.
Jezzy--the key is to not let it regrow. People kept telling me that and I didn't believe them, but shaving daily or every other day fixes that issue. Oh, and to use the three or four bladed razors only :)
I'm waiting for the day that I send somebody the wrong file or message. I also worry about text messages. It would be easy to hit the wrong button there, too.
Hmmm. Would you like to forward it to me for professional evaluation?
High Druid
So, have you posted this yet? You're going to, aren't you?
Of course you are. I mean, hell, that crotch is five years older by now. May not even be worth looking at.
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