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Location: Upstate, South Carolina, United States

I think that the Meredith Brooks' song, "Bitch," summarizes me rather nicely. Or, if you prefer, X. dell says I'm a life-smart literary scholar with a low BS tolerance...that also works!

Friday, March 11, 2005

...trix are for kids!

That's the rest of what Amanda MEANT to write...I swear! She had "Stupid Blogger" and it made me think of that old Trix commercial: "Silly Rabbit, Trix are for kids!" Yes, yes, that's dumb, but cut me some slack. My brain has leaked out of my ears.

The divorce is through. Rob and I met at court, and it all went smoothly. The judge kept asking me over and over again, "ARE YOU SURE?" as far as the terms. I think he was surprised (even though he's Rob's friend) that I wasn't asking for alimony or really, anything an ex of a lawyer usually requests. I felt like screaming back, "JUST LET ME OUT!" Anyway, we had ONE tense moment. The judge is required to ask if we think that the marriage is in any way salvagable. If either one of us replies yes, the divorce is not granted and we will be required to get counseling. He had already mumbled that he couldn't honestly answer any way but "I think the marriage can be saved." I pointed out to him a while back that it takes two people to want a marriage to work, and right now I was telling him that THIS party would never, ever agree to it, so there's no way it COULD work. He accepted that logic. Still, we reach that part of the hearing and the judge asks me, and I said, "There is no way the marriage can be saved, Your Honor." Hey, that's better than my original thoughts on how to retort: "Yes, we can stay married, but only if Your Honor wants to be hearing a case involving murder later on..." He then asks Rob and there was a painfully long pause. It was so long that I turned to stare at him, and my heart stopped beating in fear of what might follow. He looked down with the saddest, most painful eyes a human can have and mumbled, "I suppose not, Your Honor."

I felt shitty at that point. We're back to, yes I know I did the right thing, but I was raised Catholic so the guilt part doesn't just "go away." When we left the building, we both cried for a while as we hugged. Very strange. It just wasn't the vision either of us planned, I suppose.

So now I look forward to what Alex has planned: a nice meal with tons of alcohol at La Bastide and a night at the Inn. The room has a Jacuzzi and a fireplace. Woohooo!

Here, look at a sample menu:
http://www.cliffscommunities.com/la-bastide/cliffs/page/153/section/24/parent/153

Ari felt well today, but Jared feels yucky still. He now has diarrhea, so I believe he has a SECOND illness instead of one continuous one. I hate leaving him when he's sick. I know Rob will be clinging to the kids rather tightly this weekend due to our divorce, though, so I know he'll be fine.

My cold is mild and it will NOT interfere with my drinking capacity tonight. Guaranteed!

Amanda, when I tried to post on your blog, it told me your blog wasn't THERE. That was a new one! Anyway, all I wanted to add on was that my student told me that the folks who set themselves on fire were aiming for more than 30% of their bodies being burned. That is the magic number: any less, and they stay. Brrrr! I wish that soldiers like Brian would be sent home or in a less volatile position when they end up being the only parent of a child. That poor daughter of his has been through enough...

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