Dreaming, Dreaming
I find it ironic that ever since my sister had told me angrily that I had no original thoughts ever that all I've been doing is dreaming, dreaming, and dreaming some more. The snippets I remember are assembling into a story. I try and scribble down notes when I just wake up if I can recall the important parts, and everything is starting to come together. I haven't written fiction in a while. Believe me, nobody will laugh harder than me if I end up with a book out of all of this!
I guess I have a little bit of Angie disease. Angie disease is when somebody tells you that you CANNOT DO SOMETHING, and that makes you decide you're going to do it or die trying. I've noticed that she's mentioned several times in her life somebody critical telling her there's no way she can accomplish X or Y, and that just fuels her on to do it. I'm betting that later on it will be revealed that the REAL reason she passed statistics is that somebody told her she couldn't...haha! Anyway, I guess a part of me feels like saying "fuck you, thanks!" to that idea that I am not creative. My subconscious agrees anyway.
My dreams have always been a critical part of my life experience. I know some people never remember their dreams; some people remember their dreams only on occasion, but then the dreams don't make sense. Nearly all of my dreams have something important to them. Sometimes they are the proof that my mind is continuing to work on problems as I sleep. Sometimes I really believe I'm tapping into something outside of me. I have thought about elaborating on that one, but it's a rather personal thing for me. Believe me, if one of THOSE dreams end up being related to you, I'll tell you. They don't happen too often, but I am at least able to wake up and go, ah, yes, I need to pass that one on. The main way that my dreams seem to function for me is as a creative outlet. I distinctly remember since about 13 yrs of age having dreams that were definite tales, stories unfolding in front of my very eyes. I have even had pages turning as part of the dream: introduction, chapter 1, chapter 2, prologue...no, really, as the plot unfolded, each new section was that clearly separated out. I have notebooks full of scribbly notes on those stories, and some of them I've written out and shoved under my bed. Others still wait to be written. I may never get published, but I enjoy doing this for the sake of doing it when it happens, so it's ok.
I don't want to lie to you though. I HAVE had completely perplexing, wierd-ass dreams that seem to have no purpose (for instance, the Amanda Elf Machine dream I blogged about probably a year ago). It's not like everything I remember is either important or a story. However, I find that most nights I remember something...and most nights it is another piece of a puzzle in a bigger picture, either fiction or non-fiction.
I like my dreams. I like having dreams. It is my reminder that...how do I put this? I guess it's my reminder that I'm tied to something bigger and broader and more abstract than just this body. Yeah, ok, well...that made sense to me!
I guess I have a little bit of Angie disease. Angie disease is when somebody tells you that you CANNOT DO SOMETHING, and that makes you decide you're going to do it or die trying. I've noticed that she's mentioned several times in her life somebody critical telling her there's no way she can accomplish X or Y, and that just fuels her on to do it. I'm betting that later on it will be revealed that the REAL reason she passed statistics is that somebody told her she couldn't...haha! Anyway, I guess a part of me feels like saying "fuck you, thanks!" to that idea that I am not creative. My subconscious agrees anyway.
My dreams have always been a critical part of my life experience. I know some people never remember their dreams; some people remember their dreams only on occasion, but then the dreams don't make sense. Nearly all of my dreams have something important to them. Sometimes they are the proof that my mind is continuing to work on problems as I sleep. Sometimes I really believe I'm tapping into something outside of me. I have thought about elaborating on that one, but it's a rather personal thing for me. Believe me, if one of THOSE dreams end up being related to you, I'll tell you. They don't happen too often, but I am at least able to wake up and go, ah, yes, I need to pass that one on. The main way that my dreams seem to function for me is as a creative outlet. I distinctly remember since about 13 yrs of age having dreams that were definite tales, stories unfolding in front of my very eyes. I have even had pages turning as part of the dream: introduction, chapter 1, chapter 2, prologue...no, really, as the plot unfolded, each new section was that clearly separated out. I have notebooks full of scribbly notes on those stories, and some of them I've written out and shoved under my bed. Others still wait to be written. I may never get published, but I enjoy doing this for the sake of doing it when it happens, so it's ok.
I don't want to lie to you though. I HAVE had completely perplexing, wierd-ass dreams that seem to have no purpose (for instance, the Amanda Elf Machine dream I blogged about probably a year ago). It's not like everything I remember is either important or a story. However, I find that most nights I remember something...and most nights it is another piece of a puzzle in a bigger picture, either fiction or non-fiction.
I like my dreams. I like having dreams. It is my reminder that...how do I put this? I guess it's my reminder that I'm tied to something bigger and broader and more abstract than just this body. Yeah, ok, well...that made sense to me!
posted by Kira | 1:15 PM
10 Comments:
"I guess it's my reminder that I'm tied to something bigger and broader and more abstract than just this body. "
I'd use that quote, but there's really NOTHING more broad and abstract than my body!
:-)
"...bigger and broader and abstract..." Hoo boy! You are tied to the Trunk Monkey.
Sometimes, I am definitely dreaming in symbols - like the thing about the trees falling around me and my dad driving down the mountain the other night... and the scary little man with the chainsaw... I'm still freaked out when I remember him.
Other times, my dreams are like a movie. I am not in the dream as me. But I might actually be in someone else's body. These dreams can be very, very vivid. I'll be in a situation with all these total strangers, but in that body, I know them. I can sit here and FEEL what it must be like to get shot in the stomach, for example, because of a dream like that I had about being in the old west. Those dreams are usually pretty freaky too. But they are cool because I get ideas for short stories from them.
And then there were my recurring dreams. The main one was always about being lost in a new school. And something very bad was coming to get me as the halls got darker and more desolate. I haven't had that one in a long time, but it always seems to come back.
One of the coolest dreams that ever happened was when my friend Keely and I both came to school talking about the dreams that we'd had the night before, but we suddenly started desribing the same white house. I've never had a friend on my wave length like she was. We wrote a porn novel with dragons and vampires and all kinds of freaky stuff where the two main characters (us, of course) overthrew the government our senior year too, lol... fun times...
And just so you know, there's no cure for Angie Disease. The best approach is to harnass it's power and use it to show the whole damn world how awesome you are. =o)
Well, before your harnass "it's" power and get all cocky, do some proofreading... YIKES. Nah, I don't teach business writing or anything like that...
My dreams can be totally symbolic, very transparently so. But I love dreaming, remembering dreams and analyzing them. Sometimes they actually bring insight to my waking life.
I'm one of those people that don't dream or seldom remember them upon waking. It's really special to me when I have a nice dream that I remember.
"I guess I have a little bit of Angie disease. Angie disease is when somebody tells you that you CANNOT DO SOMETHING, and that makes you decide you're going to do it or die trying."
Kira, I forbid you to have wild, crazy, multiorgasmic say-my-name-bitch sex with me.
I absolutely forbid it.
I LOVE my dreams! They are vivid amazing stories of things with no chance of ever happening. I basically get to live vicariously through my dreams. I feel sad for those who never remember their dreams or have very interesting ones. And I think I understand the "outside yourself" part of dreams that you mention, they can be pretty powerful. My dreams are excellent at telling me how I really feel about people... It's funny cuz' Sam is always my protector in dreams, even if in real life I tell him to knock off the white knight bit!
I vacilate between loving and hating my dreams. Sometimes I dream too big and then I end up disappointed. But on they go... they do not seem to want to be bound by my rules of logic.
NWJR--wait, does that mean I'm tied to YOU? ;)
Amanda--so this is the plan then: we hook up our brains for one fantastic book that will immediately have the movie rights snatched up, ok?
Hoss--I would ask you what a Trunk Monkey is, but I am afraid. Very afraid ;)
Angie--a porn novel with vampires and dragons and stuff? LMAO! You know, High Druid might be able to direct you to good sources to get that published. And you being a stripper and all, well, that'd be part of the selling point for the book, right? :)
Laura--yes, that happens with me too. Sometimes my mind continues to work out things that I haven't sorted while awake, and it helps me figure out what to do.
SC--now that would be funny. The Redhead needs to video you arguing in your sleep! My ex occasionally would do wierd things like accuse me of having cards up my sleeve in the middle of the night or start giggling like a little girl and mumbling, the turtles, the turtles!
BF--see, I know there are many people like that out there. I've had a few of my friends tell me they never can remember their dreams.
Terry--LOL! And that'd SO work too if you were right here! Oh well ;)
MR--ok, now that's cute that Sam is your protector in your dreams! I think that it's symbolic not of how you WANT him to act but how you feel he loves and cherishes you in such a way. That's great :)
WW--if we enter logic into dreams, it sucks the uniqueness out of them. Sometimes things just aren't logical, so dreams truly have their place.
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