The Nice Girl-Bitch
Since I already brought up the best guy combo, I just thought I'd mention the equivalent female combination. It's easy for me to discuss because it's absolutely what I think I am.
My friend Bellybutton, when we were dating, told me once that he wanted a nice girl with a naughty streak, and I fit the bill entirely. At the time, it made me laugh, but since then I've given much thought to the concept. Most of my female friends fit that bill too. If you don't have that naughty streak, I'll constantly offend you, so I guess that's why most of my women companions are similar in nature! Haha!
The nice girl is easy to define. She is sweet, thoughtful, and kind. Good with animals and children, she reaches out to help friends in need and loves to nurture those close to her. She will bend to accomodate and knows the value of compromise. The nice girl will work hard to keep the friendship or relationship going because she simply cares about YOU.
The 'other' streak can come in two forms: Plain Naughty or Naughty Bitch. Plain Naughty is just the Ludacris statement that Amanda quotes--a lady in the streets but a freak in the bed. Her main quality is that she abandons decorum once sex enters the picture. She is wild, enthusiastic, and creative in her sexual relationships, openly sexual and flirty.
I'm actually more of the Naughty Bitch type...haha!
The Naughty Bitch has the Naughty streak as far as sex goes, but the Bitch part also gives the Nice Girl a hell of a lot of backbone. This aspect of a gal means she will bend and bend for you (per a Nice Girl), but push her too far and SHE is not the one who breaks...YOU are. The Bitch half of this streak is not constantly present. She is, of course, under most circumstances, a nice girl. It's just when the situation warrants it, Bitch appears. She can be aggressive, assertive, fiesty, and mouthy. She can say what she means, and she can show a temper. This girl is nobody's doormat. She gives her kindness to those who deserve it, and she will allow them way more leeway than the rest of the world, but she still has that boundary you cannot cross. If you do, heaven help you. Sometimes, she can combine the Naughty Bitch elements at once, giving the guy somebody whom he needs to subdue and conquor. The Naughty Bitch is flirty, fun, and still very nice...but not all of the time.
I'm definitely a Nice Girl with a Naughty Bitch Streak. I will do just about anything for anybody if it makes his or her life better. I LIKE helping people. I LIKE feeling needed. I WANT to be near you and make your path on this planet that much easier. However, if you take advantage of my niceness, you will regret it. I have a fierce temper and a hell of a lot of backbone. When it's unleashed, it's a sight to see. My ex AND Alex both have told me on several occasions: You know, you are hot as hell when you are angry...as long as it's not directed at me. Haha! I am nobody's doormat. I DO believe that the Nice Girl isn't bothered by bending more here and there than the Not So Nice Girl. That is, for some girls who truly are more self-centered, they would never do some of the things I do willingly because it inconveniences them. I'm never inconvenienced helping out a real friend or a lover...that's a priviledge. So, sometimes women or men who are Not So Nice will look at a Nice Girl or Guy's behavior and mumble that they are pushovers. The Nice Guy/Bastard or Nice Girl/Bitch are NOT pushovers. They are just more tolerant and indulgent, and their limits are broader on what they can take. Just don't cross that line...that's all you need to know...and you have a loyal friend for life who has your back whenever you need it.
And on a separate rant on the Naughty Streak, I feel badly for girls who lack it. Naughty means you are not ashamed of that which makes you a sexual being. Naughty means you relish pleasure and want to please your lover too. When a woman becomes so caught up in her upbringing on what "a nice girl" should do in the bedroom, she loses out on about 50 billion orgasms. Monogamy can become monotony pretty damn fast if you aren't willing to be creative and do things like have sex somewhere other than ON the bed and IN the bedroom every single time. That naughty streak is not only a boon to the man the Nice Girl is dating, it's a boon to the Nice Girl herself! Of course, it only works if you have a partner who is also bearing a naughty streak of some sort.
Anyway, I can't presume to tell you WHAT GUYS WANT. I'm not a guy. All I can say is that the Nice Guy-Bastard has an equivalent, and that my closest female friends and I seem to fit it as the Nice Girl-Naughty Bitch. Haha!
My friend Bellybutton, when we were dating, told me once that he wanted a nice girl with a naughty streak, and I fit the bill entirely. At the time, it made me laugh, but since then I've given much thought to the concept. Most of my female friends fit that bill too. If you don't have that naughty streak, I'll constantly offend you, so I guess that's why most of my women companions are similar in nature! Haha!
The nice girl is easy to define. She is sweet, thoughtful, and kind. Good with animals and children, she reaches out to help friends in need and loves to nurture those close to her. She will bend to accomodate and knows the value of compromise. The nice girl will work hard to keep the friendship or relationship going because she simply cares about YOU.
The 'other' streak can come in two forms: Plain Naughty or Naughty Bitch. Plain Naughty is just the Ludacris statement that Amanda quotes--a lady in the streets but a freak in the bed. Her main quality is that she abandons decorum once sex enters the picture. She is wild, enthusiastic, and creative in her sexual relationships, openly sexual and flirty.
I'm actually more of the Naughty Bitch type...haha!
The Naughty Bitch has the Naughty streak as far as sex goes, but the Bitch part also gives the Nice Girl a hell of a lot of backbone. This aspect of a gal means she will bend and bend for you (per a Nice Girl), but push her too far and SHE is not the one who breaks...YOU are. The Bitch half of this streak is not constantly present. She is, of course, under most circumstances, a nice girl. It's just when the situation warrants it, Bitch appears. She can be aggressive, assertive, fiesty, and mouthy. She can say what she means, and she can show a temper. This girl is nobody's doormat. She gives her kindness to those who deserve it, and she will allow them way more leeway than the rest of the world, but she still has that boundary you cannot cross. If you do, heaven help you. Sometimes, she can combine the Naughty Bitch elements at once, giving the guy somebody whom he needs to subdue and conquor. The Naughty Bitch is flirty, fun, and still very nice...but not all of the time.
I'm definitely a Nice Girl with a Naughty Bitch Streak. I will do just about anything for anybody if it makes his or her life better. I LIKE helping people. I LIKE feeling needed. I WANT to be near you and make your path on this planet that much easier. However, if you take advantage of my niceness, you will regret it. I have a fierce temper and a hell of a lot of backbone. When it's unleashed, it's a sight to see. My ex AND Alex both have told me on several occasions: You know, you are hot as hell when you are angry...as long as it's not directed at me. Haha! I am nobody's doormat. I DO believe that the Nice Girl isn't bothered by bending more here and there than the Not So Nice Girl. That is, for some girls who truly are more self-centered, they would never do some of the things I do willingly because it inconveniences them. I'm never inconvenienced helping out a real friend or a lover...that's a priviledge. So, sometimes women or men who are Not So Nice will look at a Nice Girl or Guy's behavior and mumble that they are pushovers. The Nice Guy/Bastard or Nice Girl/Bitch are NOT pushovers. They are just more tolerant and indulgent, and their limits are broader on what they can take. Just don't cross that line...that's all you need to know...and you have a loyal friend for life who has your back whenever you need it.
And on a separate rant on the Naughty Streak, I feel badly for girls who lack it. Naughty means you are not ashamed of that which makes you a sexual being. Naughty means you relish pleasure and want to please your lover too. When a woman becomes so caught up in her upbringing on what "a nice girl" should do in the bedroom, she loses out on about 50 billion orgasms. Monogamy can become monotony pretty damn fast if you aren't willing to be creative and do things like have sex somewhere other than ON the bed and IN the bedroom every single time. That naughty streak is not only a boon to the man the Nice Girl is dating, it's a boon to the Nice Girl herself! Of course, it only works if you have a partner who is also bearing a naughty streak of some sort.
Anyway, I can't presume to tell you WHAT GUYS WANT. I'm not a guy. All I can say is that the Nice Guy-Bastard has an equivalent, and that my closest female friends and I seem to fit it as the Nice Girl-Naughty Bitch. Haha!
posted by Kira | 6:52 AM
7 Comments:
Alex says:
Hmmm mine!
All of these qualities you just mentioned are part of the reason why you are perfect and why I love you. There are many more of course ;)
I love your bitchy side: it's great to see you slam someone into the ground because they deserve it.
Yet it is also just as wonderful when I see how caring you are about a billion different things at the same time. You kindness and compassion make my heart weep in admiration and love.
You are an ideal. You are a saint and yet still a temptress and a succubus :D
Je t'aime.
Succubus!?!?! :)
My naughty streak has been watered down for a while...but it's definately there. Not so much in the bedroom (can a vagina atrophy?), but just in practical joking when the inspiration hits.
lol! i've had ex's say to me "you are so sweet, but damn, i hope i never piss you off". oh, no truer words have ever been spoken.
i will give and give and give, until my heart bleeds, but the minute someone takes full advantage of it/me, it's on and you'd better watch out and you'd better be scared cause i don't fuck around.
I just learned to let go of that nice girl side in the bedroom. Honestly, Hof was the only one to ever bring it out of me. Mostly b/c I like him more outside the bedroom than anyone I have ever dated equalling lotsa fun inside the bedroom.
Oh the wrath of me...
Hof's heard me on occasion but has never seen me in full swing. I'm nasty. It isn't cute but I'll be damned if someone takes advantage. I have a feeling it would result in immediate naughty activities when he does see it first hand.
And ooooh....Alex left a comment. Nice w/ the succubus. Haven't heard that one used in such a way... v. sexy.
There isn't anything more fun or liberating than to drop the nice girl façade at the bedroom (or whichever room you happen to be in) door and let the naughty streak take over. Excellent post, Kira!
I think I definitely fit that same category. Just being nice is too one dimensional for me.
Alex, love! You flatter me too much *flush* It's always strange to see you post under my name instead of your Madwanderer name, but hey, thanks for not undoing my login! je t'aime aussi!
Laura--good question! Well, I know that being without sex for like two years won't make it atrophy. I learned that when things dissolved with the ex and HE wasn't getting any, yet it was before I started dating again. After two years? Not so sure.
Sandra--exactly! It's like "on, good! off, kill!" haha! I am the nicest person you'll know until you make me mad.
A*--some men aren't worth letting go in the bedroom for...but Hof sure is! Yes, I bet that he'd LOVE to see you in action one day (and he will eventually!) and your reward will be immediate! haha! And yeah, actually, Alex calls me his succubus sometimes and I LOVE it! :)
Angie--well, it's all about making life interesting and unpredictable. If he doesn't know if he gets naughty or nice at any given moment, he's more intrigued, yes? ;)
Amanda--of course you fit into this category, and Angie too! You're my friends, and nearly all my female friends are just like this! haha!
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