Running out the door
I'm heading to Columbia (two hour drive) right now with the kids.
I'm terrified. I know that frequently we will do this exact trip for the next two years as Alex finishes up his internship and also does his last year at USC. So, I bought the kids items to leave at his house...it's worse than items I leave there for ME. It's so permanent! My hands actually shook as I packed up a box of stuff we're taking down there. Some of you think I'm being a retard, I'm sure. Some of you understand. It's just...when you get married and trust you'll be married forever, and then your hubby goes nuts and that's the end of that, you feel uncertain about promises, the future, relationships, etc. I know this is the right avenue to go in life.
I'm still scared crapless.
Pardon me while I, shaking still, pack up the rest of the car and take off!
I'm terrified. I know that frequently we will do this exact trip for the next two years as Alex finishes up his internship and also does his last year at USC. So, I bought the kids items to leave at his house...it's worse than items I leave there for ME. It's so permanent! My hands actually shook as I packed up a box of stuff we're taking down there. Some of you think I'm being a retard, I'm sure. Some of you understand. It's just...when you get married and trust you'll be married forever, and then your hubby goes nuts and that's the end of that, you feel uncertain about promises, the future, relationships, etc. I know this is the right avenue to go in life.
I'm still scared crapless.
Pardon me while I, shaking still, pack up the rest of the car and take off!
posted by Kira | 12:21 PM
8 Comments:
Darling! Everything will work itself out.
You are not a retard.
You are completely entitled to be scared shitless.
You know he loves you, you know he loves your children. Hold on to that and have a FANTASTIC weekend.
Much love darling!! MWAH!
Hope you have a great weekend!
It will be wonderful. x
Don't go get cold feet on Alex. Il est fabuleux.
Really, though, you don't need to explain any further. The idea of being vulnerable is terrifying.
Now go have fun.
I think wifeandmom2 named the culprit of your shaking exactly - it's that feeling of vulnerability. But working through this to get to something meaningful and lasting, something that you CAN trust is so worth it. =o)
Since they've covered the vulnerability point, lemme just say...Kira, you can't be nervous!! You're my stable relationship role model! You can't be nervous!! ;)
I agree with A*. It's totally normal and yes, those of us who have been through the trenches, understand the "shitless fear"! But this is ALEX we're talking about here, Kira...remember? This is the guy by whom the rest of us measure the men in our lives. (All of whom come up at least slightly short...at least based on your descriptions!) Not to worry, lady! ENJOY IT!! Love is WONDERFUL!!
Good luck and enjoy, Kira. We never get any guarantees in relationships, of course. The only thing we can know for certain is that nothing is certain and sorrow is guaranteed. Therefore, when things are good, enjoy. I wish you well in this endeavor.
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