Translation Errors
Once in a while, my French fiance seems to slip with his English. Since je parle francais comme une vache espagnole, I'm totally ok with his occasional mistakes. It's way, way, WAY better than I'll ever manage French. However, once in a while we have one of these word usage/translation errors that just are too good to not share.
Earlier I had tried to call Alex's cell phone. There was no answer. Then, tonight, we were talking:
Him: I guessed that was you trying to call when I saw the missed call on the cell phone.
Me: Yeah, that was me. I thought you'd be home, so I could call...
Him: Yeah, I was home. It's just that I had put the phone on "Vibrator" and so I didn't get the call...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Damn.
Can you imagine the market? "Well, I already have a camera phone. I need something that's more fun for those lonely, late nights at the office...oh, I know, how about one of those vibrator phones! This is one phone I don't WANT small. Oh, look, it comes in purple!"
Yeah, if I had my phone on "vibrator," I'd be missing a few phone calls too. Just sayin'.
Earlier I had tried to call Alex's cell phone. There was no answer. Then, tonight, we were talking:
Him: I guessed that was you trying to call when I saw the missed call on the cell phone.
Me: Yeah, that was me. I thought you'd be home, so I could call...
Him: Yeah, I was home. It's just that I had put the phone on "Vibrator" and so I didn't get the call...
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Damn.
Can you imagine the market? "Well, I already have a camera phone. I need something that's more fun for those lonely, late nights at the office...oh, I know, how about one of those vibrator phones! This is one phone I don't WANT small. Oh, look, it comes in purple!"
Yeah, if I had my phone on "vibrator," I'd be missing a few phone calls too. Just sayin'.
posted by Kira | 7:07 PM
16 Comments:
Oh...the dinner-time conversation we're going to have in Vegas!!
Drop dead funny!! Love it!!
I laughed so hard I had to find my inhaler.=o)
Just think of the new accessories aftermarket products you could develop around that! After all, you'd have to have a place to relocate it. No sense strapping it to your side when...
...well, you know what I mean.
I hate to burst y'all's collective hymen, but I believe such devices already exist: I think there's an external "ringer" you can attach to a cellphone. You place the "ringer" where it can do the most good. Then you give out your phone number to, oh, say, 7000 of your closest "friends." Those "friends" can then, in the words of old Ma Bell, "reach out and touch someone" -- you, hopefuly. Better hope your airtime budget and libido are in sync. For my part, I wonder about a question William Gibson asked maybe twenty-some years ago: "Who's going to test-dick the force-feedback vagina?" Or something like that. :)
Kira,
Did you read my "cell phone" flash piece? Lots o sexual innuedo around a vibrating cell--go to www.flasheville.com and scroll down to "Woman Waiting."
Enjoy!
I think your fiance might have something there. You might find a number of everyday household appliances that could benefit from vibrator technology. You'd obviously rule out such things as dishwashers, grabage disposals, ginsu knives or other things that might be too, um, thrilling.
But for moms, a vibrating rattle might work. And since people are always losing the damn things in the cracks of their sofa, a vibrating television/dvd remote could go unnoticed for weeks, perhaps.
You know what they say: better living through science.
I worked with a French guy who told me to make copies and to "check the quality." I ran the copies and ensured they all came out clear. Later he wanted to know why I mailed them with only one copy per envelope. Apparently he meant "check the quantity" because, instead of sending the documents to branch offices to be copied there, I was supposed to run multiple copies and ship them out.
So, what's French for "D'oh"?
grant, I believe it's "merde".
doc-t...go for unlimited night and weekend minutes!
Alex, I hope you're laughing, too...either that or calling Kira.
Alex is just multitasking!
id make a comment about 'french letters' but youd 'take it the wrong way'
Hehe Kira has by now experienced many French techniques such as French kisses, French hugs, French snuggling, French massages…And now, French Cell phones.
As far as “doh”, I vary: putain, merde, putain de merde, bordel de couilles or bordel de merde are my usuals.
I saw this ad for "anti blushing pills, do they work?" a girl hears her phone ringing and reaches in her purse grab what she thinks is her phone then realizes it's her ibrator. heh.
HA HA!! That's great!
When I went to Colombia (s.america) I accidentally said that I was horny instead of "I'm hot"
Totally unintentional. I know that's hard to believe but I was only 16. I didn't know better.
How much does one of those cost at the ring-tones place? (No, I don't want to know how many euros.)
Call my cell. If I don't answer please don't leave a message just try again until I answer. I have the phone set to vibrator and am boyfriendless at the moment.
1 (555) 555-1234 call me please... lol
Mandy--oh yeah! Especially after we have a few drinks. I'll join you on the piano!
Angie--haha! glad you enjoyed it!
NWJR--actually, I had a student once try to hide her vibrating cell phone between her legs in the middle of class. No shit. I happened to know her husband was out of town on a trip that week, so I looked at her and said, "Miss your husband much?" She screamed out OH MY GOD, then turned beet red and fled the room. Well, it worked. No more cell phone :)
Joe--I know what I want for Christmas now.
EM--I'll have to check it out!
X.Dell--my god! Here I am broke, and there you are coming up with excellent ideas to make us rich and retire. Let's go for it!
Grant--one of the good ones that happened around here was when a french teacher misunderstood the saying "go stretch your legs." He told a class that was predominantly full of women to "go spread their legs."
Laura--he laughed a lot...and called me too ;)
Amanda--indeed! A man of many talents!
Cookie--bah! old joke. Come up with a new one ;)
Doc-T--the idea is that a lot of women get called by lots of people they know moreso than call themselves. It's more fun that way. Woohoo!
Alex--I like the French way of approaching life. I have determined that most French ways of doing things involve good food or good sex. Vive la France!
CS--I SO need to see that commercial. It reminds me of the Ikea one where the boy finds the vibrator.
April--but is it really so much of a mistranslation if it's also true?
Hoss--probably as much as any adult pleasure device would!
Doe--all righty, then we should get everybody to call. One, two, three, and GO!
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