The Old and the New
When I was young, I thought romance consisted of sweet words, flowers, chocolates, bubble baths, and massages. Anything that involved quiet time with my loved one wherein he doted upon me or showed that he thought of me all day was exactly what I wanted and expected. Ironically, even though my viewpoint on what is romantic has changed, I still DO get all of those things, constantly, from Alex. He has no idea that after being married for three and a half years, we're no longer newlyweds and he should start to slack off, scratch his ass, and drink beer while playing a video game (he isn't into sports), ignoring the rest of the family as we go about our business. If anything, he's even more involved. So, I get the best of what I thought was romance when I was young...and currently.
What romance becomes:
Vacuuming the house, then mopping it
Taking the kids to school because it's below freezing outside, and my circulation disorder makes it so that I get dangerously cold easily
Cleaning up cat barf, dog barf, and child barf cheerfully and without complaint...or even being asked
Cleaning up the kitchen right after dinner, every dinner, every night
Spending all his free time playing a game with Jared...then playing with Ari...then finding time for me before he falls into bed, too
Hunting up books I've never heard of but he just knows I'd like...then buying them for me
Making me tea and toast when I feel like crap, then turning around and taking care of the kids so that I can stay in bed
Listening to me...intently, with interest...about my babbles on wine, food, the world I created that is the beginnings of my newest story, the amount I saved with super double coupons, how the cat turned the most hilarious things into toys today, or how adorable Jared was in his martial arts class...anything, everything
Willingly waking up at 4a when I can't sleep, even though I'm trying not to wake him up, and rubbing my head while talking softly to me so I can fall back asleep
Always remembering to scrape the ice off my car's windshield because he leaves the house first and he wants me to not have to do it
Practicing martial arts with Jared
Reading a book Ari's reading just because she wants him to read it, too
Remembering to turn on the heating pad under Jared's sheets before he goes to bed so he's not too cold on the coldest nights
Patiently filming Ari and her best friend's antics for a science project for school
****
Oh, I could go on and on. But the truth is, romance when we are older is a much more practical, yet still magical, concept. Every day I am romanced by this man, showed to be special, made to feel loved...and it's not just the flowers/chocolates/backrubs/bubble baths/lit candles and petals strewn on my sheets. I'm obnoxiously lucky and get that, too, but it's the every day little things that he does that shows me what real romance has become.
What romance becomes:
Vacuuming the house, then mopping it
Taking the kids to school because it's below freezing outside, and my circulation disorder makes it so that I get dangerously cold easily
Cleaning up cat barf, dog barf, and child barf cheerfully and without complaint...or even being asked
Cleaning up the kitchen right after dinner, every dinner, every night
Spending all his free time playing a game with Jared...then playing with Ari...then finding time for me before he falls into bed, too
Hunting up books I've never heard of but he just knows I'd like...then buying them for me
Making me tea and toast when I feel like crap, then turning around and taking care of the kids so that I can stay in bed
Listening to me...intently, with interest...about my babbles on wine, food, the world I created that is the beginnings of my newest story, the amount I saved with super double coupons, how the cat turned the most hilarious things into toys today, or how adorable Jared was in his martial arts class...anything, everything
Willingly waking up at 4a when I can't sleep, even though I'm trying not to wake him up, and rubbing my head while talking softly to me so I can fall back asleep
Always remembering to scrape the ice off my car's windshield because he leaves the house first and he wants me to not have to do it
Practicing martial arts with Jared
Reading a book Ari's reading just because she wants him to read it, too
Remembering to turn on the heating pad under Jared's sheets before he goes to bed so he's not too cold on the coldest nights
Patiently filming Ari and her best friend's antics for a science project for school
****
Oh, I could go on and on. But the truth is, romance when we are older is a much more practical, yet still magical, concept. Every day I am romanced by this man, showed to be special, made to feel loved...and it's not just the flowers/chocolates/backrubs/bubble baths/lit candles and petals strewn on my sheets. I'm obnoxiously lucky and get that, too, but it's the every day little things that he does that shows me what real romance has become.