The General News
Alex and I decided to do the civil ceremony NOW, and then do the party in France probably in December of 2007. So, those who want a reason to be in Clermont-Ferrand at that time, you have it! Come on down! Haha!
So, when do I legally become Mrs. Sol?
Sept. 2nd, Saturday. A week from today.
We aren't inviting anybody save the witnesses and the children. It's sort of a "get r done" type of arrangement that will make immigration easier for him later on and our life easier NOW in a variety of ways. Grant had an excellent point earlier: maybe a year and a half of being married will calm me down enough to relax and enjoy the big party later on. I think he's totally right.
It's not like I have any doubts about Alex. Let's review. He loves my kids as his own, gets along with them better than their own father, and loves kids so much he wants more. In addition to loving kids, he loves animals, and he has pretty much taken on my cat Chian as his too (in fact, we sometimes have wars over who gets cat custody for the week...haha!). He listens when I babble, even if it's about stupid stuff. I know he's listening because six months later, he can act upon what I said or repeat back to me word for word what was bothering me. I get flowers, chocolates, and small gifts from time to time for no reason. I get nightly--and I DO mean NIGHTLY--massages of 30 min or more. I finally have a man who has a libido that can stand up to mine (not that you want to know this, but, um, I have problems wearing down men. I tease Alex that it's another reason why I went younger this time! haha!). He is physically gorgeous to me, containing the three major elements I find most physically appealing (jawline, light colored eyes, dark hair). He smells fantastic. He has a huge heart, willing to assist anyone at any time. Although very selfless, he also can put his foot down and have his own needs met when needed so that he doesn't ever get resentful. He's patient. He's considerate. He's smart, and damn does he make me laugh. We share similar passions (for geek things, movies, cuddling, books, travel, food, wine, etc.). He is motivated and works hard, plus knows how to budget and handle money. Additionally, he CLEANS MORE THAN I DO. Damn. The man is always vacuuming, mopping, scrubbing, or washing SOMETHING. Alex does not scream when he is upset...ever. Nor get a nasty face. He just quietly lets it be known that things are not making him happy, and then he wants to discuss the situation until we are both happy with the results.
I have never been happier in my life. I have a true partner, and I can't be thankful enough he entered my life. Plus, my family and friends all love him too! Nobody can ever come close to the great fit that is Alex in my life. I especially love how I can be the total bitch that I sometimes am and he just...looks at me with that adoring smile, saying "I love you." He doesn't care that I am a natural flirt, nor does he care that I can be very sharp with my words. He thinks it's great! Wow. Several years have passed, and here we are at this fantastic jumping point to the great beyond.
And hell, if it doesn't work out, Grant has strict orders to shoot me on sight ;) Alex has never screwed up, but I have one marriage behind me. Obviously if things go awry again, it's ME and not him, so Grant has agreed--out of feck off with love for me--to kill me if it doesn't work out. Where are the worries then? None, really.
We have the rings. I love the man in a way I never thought was possible to love another. As this morning unraveled, I marveled how we all just act like a family. Ari and I were talking about her current Man Situation, curled up in a bed and giggling, and Alex was on the floor building bionicles with Jared. So peaceful. So homey. So perfect. What did I ever do to deserve great friends, great family, great kids, and a great husband-to-be??? Whatever it is, I want to keep on doing it because this is just...wow.
So, on the Ariana front, speaking of the man thing:
Last year, her boyfriend was Mark (second grade love!). Mark never contacted Ari over the summer, and when they came back to school he assumed that no matter what, she was still his. He didn't have to say anything or do anything. Ari was his *grunt, club, drag off to lair*. Mark is smart and funny and nice, so it's not like I have an objection here to Ari hanging out with him, but still. That's the set up.
For several years at Ari's school, there has been this darling boy named Andrew who has worshipped her in a way that makes EVERYBODY know that she is adored totally by him. I admit the bias: he reminds me of the way that Alex treats me. Andrew sent Ari a carnation last year for Valentine's Day even though they weren't an item...and it made me sniff. Ari was pleased too. He felt he never had a chance with her. She was his dream girl, and he didn't deserve THAT. But he kept trying...awww, I guess that reminded me of Alex!
So the year starts out, and Andrew remains devoted to her, then asks if she will be his girlfriend. He asked twice when Mark continued to just assume. Now, in a situation that is sure to change by the time she is a teen, Ari said: I can't tell you my answer until I talk it over with my mom. She gives great advice, and I need to talk to her first.
(ok, so when she told me that part, I sniffed a lot...so sue me).
Friday, she told Andrew. Friday I will give you my answer. So, Thursday I pick them up at school and Ari tells me all of that. "What should I do?" she asks, clearly anguished.
"Well, has Mark said he cares for you or anything affectionate since school started? Did he ask you if you'd still be his girlfriend?"
"Ok, do you play with him at least?"
"Yeah, with others, but he seems to just think we're together and never talks to me about anything."
"Ok, so how does Andrew treat you? In contrast?"
"He talks to me a lot, tells me how much he likes me and how great I am, and asks me to be his girlfriend." (remember now we're at third grade....awwww!)
"Ok, so how does that make you feel? Do you like that, or do you prefer the way Mark interacts with you?"
"Mom, I think I need to be with Andrew because he's a better communicator. I think he'll work out better with me. He DOES treat me better for sure."
"Ok, then, so what do you think you should do?"
"Ok, I tell Andrew tomorrow that I'm his girlfriend!"
Andrew died of joy on Friday. It was so sweet. And Ari is happy with her choice. If only adult decisions could be made with such ease........